Andy and Bernadette have been married for more than 23 years. That is longer than the Human Library has been in existence. They are one of very few couples that are also both Books on our bookshelf. If you are lucky you can read them when they are published at our events in the United Kingdom. 

A Book about Deafness

Andy has been deaf all of his life but he does not see himself like that, “it’s just something that I learned to deal with” he says. He is a Book on overcoming obstacles and achieving success in life while dealing with a hearing disability.  

He was the youngest of five children, so safe to say it was a full house which provided him with valuable life skills: “I picked up language quite well, it was a busy house”. 

Parents Resisted Sending Andy to a School for Deaf Children

In the 1970s when he was five years old, the local authorities wanted to send him to a school for children that were deaf, which would entail that he was going to be away from home. 

“My mom and dad were against it because they felt that I was a normally functioning kid”. Andy then had to take an intelligence test to prove he was just like a ‘normal’ child, and to the surprise of the authorities, he turned out to be quite intelligent: “I obviously did OK and ended up going to a normal school”. 

Awarded by Lady Diana and Hired by Heineken

He was the first child with a hearing disability to go to that school, “And I did well” he adds.  “Eventually I went to university and was given an award for ‘Young Deaf Achiever of the year’”.

The award was presented and given to him by the late Lady Diana, a day he will never forget: 

“It was quite a big achievement getting a university degree despite being deaf”. 

Andy later went on to have a 30-year career as a chartered Engineer in the brewing industry and latterly working for Heineken UK and this is where he first learned about the Human Library. He became a reader through work and after that he volunteered to become a book.

“Being deaf has its moments of frustration but for me, it has always been about your ability and not your disability”.

An Open Book about Anxiety and Depression

Bernadette’s story as a Book at the Human Library highlights her experience with anxiety and depression after being subject to bullying, 

“I was bullied at work by someone who was working for me”. 

Bernadette was working in HR and found herself in a difficult position, “so when working in Human Resources, where can you go to if you are being bullied?”. 

The bullying went on for two years and had a severe impact on her mental health. Upon returning after a holiday, she found herself trembling with fear at the thought of getting back into the office: 

“On my drive there my foot was on the brake and I was shaking”. She went into the office anyway but quickly became unwell, “I just said I think I’ve got jetlag, I am going home, I don’t feel well, which was all a lie”, she recalls.

 After coming home, she rang up the doctors and they wanted to see her straight away, “that threw me off because I wasn’t expecting that”, she adds “So, I went to the doctors and cried and got signed off for a month. I was able to get support very quickly and spent 6 months as a day patient where I had therapy sessions”. 

Despite her efforts to return to work, the bullying persisted, this time by a new perpetrator. Bernadette ended up taking a year off, seeking therapy and medication to help with her struggles. 

The Human Library Experience

Before being published as a Book, Andy first became a Reader multiple times: “I work for Heineken and they were quite supportive of the Human Library, so I got to read a number of Books at different events, and I would come home and tell Bernadette all about it and about some of the Books that I read”. 

Bernadette had been doing some work for Stockport Libraries on mental health and her own story with it. Then Stockport Library wanted to host a Human Library and was in need of Books to publish, “so I said come on, Andy, you know this” Bernadette says. 

Publishing Locally

They arrived at the Book training expecting it to be a local version of the Human Library but quickly found that it was the real deal. Andy even recognised a Book that he had the pleasure of reading at one of the events through work.

In total, 8 Books were published at Stockport Library that day. “While we were waiting to be taken out by readers, we were reading each other’s stories and it was just a really joyous, positive and gorgeous day. We loved it, didn’t we?” Bernadette says as she looks at Andy. “Yeah, it was lovely to be in a room full of different storybooks and have the experience of listening to each other’s stories and becoming friends effectively through that”.

We Forgot How to Talk to Each Other

They both agree that the Human Library is an effective tool for challenging stigmas and fostering meaningful conversations.  “It’s amazing how easily it can break down barriers quite quickly because it allows you to have a discussion about something and you also learn how to talk to people. I think we have forgotten how to.” Andy says and Bernadette adds, “I always say the conversations that you should be having are the ones you avoid and what the Human Library does, is that it creates that safe space where you can ask everything and you can make mistakes and that is OK. If you reduce the fear you automatically increase your confidence.”

Sharing Stories

Being married for 23 years has not always been a walk in the library, “we’ve had our struggles but we ploughed on and supported each other through grief, losing our parents and we just try to be open. Sometimes I quite happily want to run away”, Bernadette says with a smile, “but that is what marriage is about, it has its ups and downs, and our Books and topics are who we are. Ultimately, we just talk. When you are bringing up a family and consumed by chores and routine meaningful conversation can be forgotten because you’re so tired and just want to switch off”. 

Being published as a Book has been a unique experience for both of them. Participating in the Human Library event has allowed them to challenge their own stereotypes and judgements of others. They found that the experience of being Books and being published has helped them to connect on a deeper level, both with each other and with other Readers. 

“For me, I think this has allowed us to share a bit more with the family”, Andy says and continues “it makes you think differently and it does make you challenge your stereotypes when you meet someone who whether it is a disability or something hidden that you would not notice, it does challenge your judgement of people”. 

Read our previous Book of the Month article about Daniel who sees his wheelchair as anything but a limitation.

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From Paris to Amsterdam to Borrow an Open Book

Orestis Christoforides reading an Open Book at Café Amstel Hoeck

With support from our friends at Heineken, the Human Library Book Cafe was open daily to readers at Café Amstel Hoeck. Three days in a row our Readers could borrow a Book while enjoying local drinks and dutch snacks. As always the services of the Human Library are free and so we registered more than 120 loans to readers. We were joined by Readers from Argentina, Belgium, Denmark, France, Hungary, Netherlands, Switzerland, USA, and Uruguay. One reader traveled from Paris in order to experience the Human Library:

“I traveled to Amsterdam specifically for the Human Library event as there were no events planned in France for the time being. I have been aware of the Human Library for some time after reading about it in the news. Being able to meet people who have such unique identities or are easily labeled or discriminated against seemed like a unique opportunity“, said Orestis Christoforides, who took a day off from work to become our reader. 

All Access to our Bookshelf

Our Book and their Reader at the Amstel Hoeck Café

In Amsterdam, our readers had a free choice of topics from our bookshelf and it was common that readers would borrow more than one book during their visit.“Time flew and I ended up staying for 5 hours and reading 5 different books”, said Orestis Christoforides about his experience. 

Among the topics, readers could choose from were Bisexual, Holocaust Survivor, Self Harm, Bipolar, Victim of Abuse, Victim of Stalking, Muslim, Transgender, and Body Modified to name but a few and as always our Librarians encouraged our Readers to be brave and curious when asking their questions: “Reading a human book is a fantastic experience. We are encouraged to ask very direct questions, so the conversations were incredibly open and comfortable. What pushed you to see a therapist? Have you done time? Do you have any prejudices of your own?”, says Orestis Christoforides. 

Here is what some of our Readers had to say:

There is also room for smiles in serious conversations

“It was really awesome to hear someone else’s experience that is so different from my own, and I felt super comfortable asking questions, which was lovely! Thank you!!”

“I think I’m just amazed at how much courage and openness it takes to tell strangers your stories and I’m grateful that the Human Library exists.”

“My conversation with a transgender person was a beautiful philosophical exploration with many great insights: like there is no truth, don’t make assumptions on how people behave.”

“There was a lot more going on behind the title. The books exposed their own human limitations and weaknesses very honestly, which is what I ended up relating to. I can say I returned from my short journey with the impression of having made friends and  feeling more capable at “unjudging” others, even people which I disagree with (or even dislike!)”

A thank you to our partners from Heineken for making it possible for us to contribute to the Amsterdam Pride Week program.

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Over the summer nearly 200 members of Heineken UKs Leadership Development Program will become readers of The Human Library . The program is scheduled to run from May to July at Heineken’s offices in London and Edinburgh.

The corporation between Heineken UK and the Human Library Organization started last year with an invitation to partner on an effort to build a more open world. The campaign included the film “worlds apart” and a series of local Human Library events aimed at engaging with the public.

Muffe Vulunz (Extreme body modified) – Heineken Open Your World campaign launch with The Human Library, a not-for-profit organisation that uses conversation to challenge stereotypes, in Covent Garden, London. The campaign aims to highlight that there is more to unite us than divide us.

The five events were held at different locations around the United Kingdom and helped pave the way for new book depots and more local partnerships across the country enabling the Human Library to integrate further with civil society in the UK.

Last years activities also included two staff sessions and a key stakeholder event. Needless to say, both parties felt the outcomes were very positive.

First global brand to become a diversity partner

Heineken is the first global brand to integrate the Human Library into their HR programs and become Human Library Diversity partner. Founder Ronni Abergel is excited about the development.

“The Human Library is full of courageous people. People who are willing to open up to strangers and share. The people working at Heineken UK are very similar. They are not afraid to challenge what they think they already know and through open and honest dialogue come to an greater understanding of our diversity”.

The Human Library Organization will deliver services to four separate events as part of the Leadership Development Program.

Watch the Heineken “Worlds Apart” campaign film here

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